Scientists have discovered a toadstool that protects against colds. Eat it, it’s free!

  • Is it compulsory to eat it?
  • No, of course, we don’t oblige anyone, only those who wish to.
  • Okay then, I don’t want to.
  • Eat the mushroom!
  • No.
  • We’re giving you a free salad with it and a holiday voucher.
  • I’ll pass.
  • All intelligent people eat the toadstool for colds, only those with low IQs refuse. You have to believe in science!
  • And who will be responsible if the toadstool harms me?
  • You, of course, we are not responsible.
  • I definitely don’t want a toadstool.
  • You have to want it because if you refuse, those who have already eaten their toadstools get sick.
  • Maybe if they hadn’t eaten the toadstools they wouldn’t be sick!?
  • Such an anti-mushroom!
  • I’m not an anti mushroom man, I’ve eaten mushrooms before, but this is toadstool! I don’t want to risk it. At least tell me what it contains!
  • Yikes, the exact description is a trade secret and you’ll be able to see it in 175 years.
  • But sir, I won’t be alive after all these years.
  • That’s not our problem anymore. It’s the law. But studies show it’s perfectly safe and 90% prevents the common cold.
  • But my neighbor died while jogging in the stadium, shortly after his second bout.
  • He was eating fresh homegrown vegetables, that’s why. Toadstools are perfectly safe!
  • But he’s not the only one, others have suffered from the toadstools.
  • This is fake news, stop spreading it and eat your toadstool!
  • Well, how would they be fake, before people left the stadium aliveā€¦
    I won’t eat any toadstool.
  • If you don’t eat your toadstools, both of them, we’ll declare you a dangerous public enemy and we won’t let you go to malls, movie theaters, and restaurants.
  • Do I have to eat two already?
  • No. It’s already 3 and that way you’re 80% likely to prevent yourself from catching a cold.
  • Weren’t they 90%?
  • You ask too many questions and you are an enemy of the people, and of public health, and of freedom..

*All similarities with the reality aren’t coincidence.

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